Some years ago, I received a gift of a precious gem from my partner, and it was a birthstone gem with some bling attached to it. It was a gift I cherished, so I kept it safe and admired it a lot. Whenever I wear it, I am aware and will always be on the lookout, checking it’s not lost etc. The word cherish is important to women, and it is one of the words husbands’ vows during a marriage ceremony. I believe some people do not fully understand the word cherish nor grasp its depth and how it impacts a marriage.
I believe some people do not fully understand the word cherish nor grasp its depth.
The English dictionary defines CHERISH as caring and protecting someone lovingly. To hold dear and keep in mind and have hope or ambition. If I want to explain the word “to cherish” to a man, I would like to think the best thing to exemplify it is how a man loved his car, his wristwatch or some of their toy gadgets. I can attest to how some men I know care and cherish their vehicles. While a woman’s car may be scruffy, men usually ensure their vehicle is cleaned and serviced; they will not allow anyone to kick, stain or dirty this car. No matter how many times this car fails to work, the car will be taken to a mechanic to repair and restore it. No matter how many times this car has caused disappointment by not getting its owner to the destination, it was picked up to be repaired. Its value has not diminished to its owner, even though some people would look at this car and say what an old, rugged car, to its owner, its worth is not determined by the number of faults, failure, or age. It is simply an item that they treasure. This is what it means to love and cherish.
“he is always present to protect and care for the gift God gave him and allowed him to choose so he will not blame God.“
Can you imagine a man that loves and cherishes his wife this way! It would mean there can never be abuse, no matter their differences and challenges; he is always present to protect and care for the gift God gave him and allowed him to choose so he will not blame God.
I hope every man choosing a woman to love and cherish will grasp this understanding first and know the weight of the vow and commitment he is entering. No wonder the bible warned men to deal with women with care so that their prayers are not hindered. When a person’s prayers are delayed, the blessings are hindered. I pray many who are suffering today because of the way they have treated or treated the gift of God in their lives will get understanding. It is not a cliché but biblical: A Cherished wife is a treasure that will bring joy to her husband.
No wonder the bible warned men to deal with women with care so that their prayers are not hindered
Below are five tips on how you can begin or continue to cherish your wife.
- Do you have a conviction that your wife is your other half if not your better half – your wife one with you? Whatever you do to her will affect you. It is ignorant and unwise if you do not consider her part of you that’s not easily divided. I always illustrate with the children in a marriage; you cannot separate them. It is only with your wife that you become truly one. Your umbilical cord was severed from your mother and siblings, but you cannot sever your wife without getting hurt yourself.
- Do not mistreat or abuse your wife; she is a treasure that God allowed you to have. A woman does not need to groan because of you – Make sure your wife is blessing you because of how you deal with her delicately. She is not a weak subordinate but delicate and so handled with care. Don’t let her sigh because heaven and earth will respond.
- Do genuinely care, protect, and shield your wife in a difficult situation – what you say to people about your wife, how you deal with her in public and how you fight her reveal whether you cherish your wife. Love covers a multitude of sins. A man’s virtuous woman is by their definition, and people will believe what you call your wife.
- You cannot spoil her too much – once you get tip number one right, you will have no problem spending and providing for your wife. I am sure you cannot cloth, love or feed half of your body! You are not entirely clothed. How you treat your wife reflects on you.
- Do recognise, she is a gift and your favour from God – your wife is your favour and a blessing; remember that: it will help you adore, cherish, and love her, especially if you recognise and believe God gave you this gift.
As a husband or husband to be: How are you treating this gift and how would you cherish this woman? It reflects on you and on God too.
Would you be proud to say I cherish and love my wife?
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church because we are members of his body.” (Ephesians 5:25-30)
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Abi Apalara loves sharing insightful information that helps couples flourish in life and their marriage relationship. I have enjoyed both good marital pleasures and challenging times in my marriage. I came to realise, the points where I missed it, were areas I lacked information on how to.
Making it up along the way, only meant I was going the wrong way. Desperately seeking to get back into marital bliss, I started exploring and reading about those areas of challenge. I also reached out to counselors and began to see what I was missing.
After a surprising move into relationship study, I have found peace of mind and happy with my marriage. I have authored the book Are you ready? Marriage expectation versus realty to share my experience and encourage men and women to work on their
marriages, by seeking knowledge and apply it to their marriage relationship.
My latest book, Are you ready? Marriage expectation versus reality focuses on discovering some of the unrealistic expectations we bring into a marriage. It comes with practical advice and a guide on how to get it right before and after getting married. You can also preorder the book here
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