Build love legacies and traditions to sustain your love.

It is true that love alone cannot and will not keep your marriage if you ignore the covenant. If you rely on your own strength and ability, and most importantly, if you refuse to honour and apply the principles that make marriage work.

However, when love is present and maintained, it is an essential binder and glue that will strengthen the bond of your union. Love is the first thing that brought you and your spouse together, exemption would be where marriage was arranged or set up with the wrong motive. But generally, marriage begins when two people fall in love and promise to share that love with each other forever.

Suggested read: Don’t stop dating each other

Falling in love is the easiest thing to do, keeping in love is the hard work and falling out of love is real and possible. No couple madly in love, would ever expect that they will fall out of love, but my friend that is the expectation, reality is people fall out of love. The proof is seen in many marriages broken and divorced today; it all began with the death of love. Love is passion, it is a flame kept burning by constant refueling and fanning to flame.

Love consumes resources and energy to keep it aflame. I love this song we usually sing in my church; it talks about keeping our love for God burning, it was composed and sang by Jonathan Miller. It goes like this; “Light a flame, within my soul, Holy Fire consume my all, spirit blaze, shine out of me and burn for all the world to see”. Your marriage is kept glowing because of the flame of love. You must be ready to continue to fuel your love and fan it. How do you do that? I have noticed from my experience and those of other married couples around me, that establishing love traditions early in your marriage and a commitment to honour and uphold that tradition, no matter how horrible you feel can rekindle the flame of your love for each other even in the dark, cold days of your marriage.

You can also read: Choose to be happy in your marriage

One of such that works for me and my hubby is celebrating our birthdays as a family. We have always put in the effort to buy each other gifts, bake cakes and wake up earl to celebrate and share our joys. Even on rare occasions when we do not feel like talking to each other, because it has become our tradition, there is still that need to go and buy gifts and cards for each other. No matter how terrible we feel at that point, we are deliberate to show love and celebrate, we end up going out, laughing and dancing. What love tradition or legacy would you put in place in your marriage? Here are some tips, go on yearly holidays, do something romantic on your wedding anniversary, have Friday special dinners, yearly visit to a special place that resonate with your love or relationship.

It is my birthday and I have the joy of being celebrated by my husband and children, I look forward to it every year. Build a loving legacy today if you haven’t got one in place already.

Read about my forthcoming book: Are you ready! Marriage Expectation Versus Reality.